Crack the Paragon
by ChromaticDreams
Summary: In another world, he doesn't have his mother's sword or shield to hide behind when Bismuth lands her strike. The bubble pops. Steven falls apart. (Basically a whole boatload of family drama is unearthed two seasons early. Because of reasons. Canon divergent from s3ep24, "Bismuth," will feature whole cast eventually.)
1. Pink

_Chapter One: Pink_

* * *

"So what are you gonna do, _shatter_ me?!"

Bismuth's tone is corrosive, boiling with hurt, as sharp as the fine point that she's forcibly pressed against the gem inlaid in her chest. Steven's hands quiver against the cool metal casing of the breaking point. Once assured words derail and fragment in the presence of terrifying uncertainty, his mind grasping at straws for the barest glimmer of optimism. (Optimistic thought number one: While it's absolutely the most horrifying tool of war he's ever had the misfortune of holding, he's at least glad this thing isn't a thousand billion degrees like everything else in this crazy lava powered furnace.)

"Go ahead!" she continues, tears budding in her eyes, and jerks the weapon against her gem so roughly that it clinks against the hard crystal's surface. His shoulders seize at the sound. "Just do it!"

Whatever force of fear that once tied his tongue dissipates at the first sight of her distress.

"No!" he says, surmounting the strength to rebel against her hold, to pull the razor-sharp point away from her. "Even if we don't agree, nobody deserves this..."

In an instant, a complex series of emotions flicker across her stony features in consuming waves too rapid to identify. Confusion, maybe? A hint of relief? He dares to dream she'll reconsider, earnestly apologize, back down and store the weapon away. Destroy it, even. They can warp to the temple together, and then everything will finally return to normal. A _new_ normal, with her a part of his Crystal Gem family! Amethyst will have a new wrestle buddy, and Pearl and Garnet will smile a little brighter alongside their old friend!

But any hope he dares cling to is quickly incinerated under the blistering anger radiating from deep within that Gem's tear stained eyes. She yanks the breaking point from his grasp. Heart pounding in his ears, his glance desperately skates over his mom's sword lying across the room. Too far away, _too far away_! Bismuth raises her weapon adorned arm above her head and swings.

It happens so fast there's not even time to summon his shield. Instinctively the world around him turns to pink, but he knows his limits, knows the bubble's protection won't be enough. Not against something like this, not at point blank. Steven grinds his molars together, slams his eyes shut. He suddenly wishes he hugged everyone goodnight before going to bed. He wishes he texted his dad.

The bubble pops.

In a heartbeat, agony tears through his nerves like nothing he's ever experienced before, radiating from his gem all the way to the tips of his fingers and toes and drawing a hoarse scream from his lips. Something within him shatters into fragments, rips away with a force unimaginable and shoves him forcibly to the warm stone. He desperately tries to raise another bubble shield but now his body is _cold, cold, cold_ and his head feels woozy, stuffed to the brim with cotton. He catches a faint flicker of pink through the crack of his eyelids. But that solid clink against crystal, followed by that horrid, horrid sound— the unmistakable sign of a cracking gemstone— might as well have come from miles away.

* * *

When he finally opens his eyes again, he's immediately aware of two things.

One: he's shivering. Despite the overwhelming heat of the forge, heat he knows should be making him sweat rivers, his body convulses and his teeth chatter like he's just come out of the snow.

Two: after her aggression he doesn't understand why, but Bismuth is holding him. His breath hastens as he realizes this, but in his current state of disorientation he doesn't fight it. She's pressed him tight against her chest like he's suddenly the most precious being in existence, her hard-light form nearly burning to the touch even though Gem bodies don't produce heat like organic life does. Paired alongside the uncontrollable shivering, he's pretty sure that's reason for concern.

"I'm so, _so_ sorry," she cries, fat tears budding at the corners of her eyes and spilling down her cheeks. "Shards, I- I was so sure that you were somehow Rose that I almost—" Her voice hitches, unable to complete that sentence.

A pang of... of indescribable _emptiness_ assails him then, and a glimpse at the figure standing motionless where he once stood enlightens him on concerning reality number three.

"Steven. Steven, please tell me you can still hear me? Please tell me you're not- I didn't mean to- for any of this to happen, I swear!"

"W-what..." His throat constricts, horror gripping his limbs as he shakily pulls up the hem of his shirt and finds nothing but smooth, blemish-less skin. "Where's my—?" His gemstone is nowhere to be seen. Gone. Except...

His gaze drops once more on the softly glowing, pink clone of himself that's currently staring at him with hauntingly blank irises. He doesn't speak a word, and his expression barely shifts at all, but Steven soon finds himself understanding his other self's existence regardless. He... he saved him. _(Them?) _Somehow, this hard-light manifestation split himself apart to shove him away from Bismuth's strike, sparing him from the brunt of the breaking point's force. And yet...

Phantom pains from a gem he no longer possesses arc like lightning through his now completely human body. He gives a sharp whimper, his eyes growing wet. It's almost immobilizing, reminiscent of the feeling one gets when they accidentally slam their funny bone against a counter or a door jam except it's everywhere at once. Simultaneously, his pink double's form glitches like a video game sprite.

_Oh. Oh, no. Surely that's not what—_

Bismuth pulls his frail form tighter as he bursts into tears. Memories of a distant afternoon he's tried so hard to forget slam to the forefront of his mind, leaving him helpless under their power. Amethyst, fracturing her gemstone when she fell on the hard edge of a boulder. Amethyst, her form glitching and morphing wildly, growing more and more unstable with every minute until she could barely speak or move. The bone chilling cracking noise that plays over and over in his deepest darkest nightmares, absolutely unmistakable in its horror, just like the sound of a car's bumper crunching inwards. The same noise ringing through his ears not moments ago, the breaking point aimed straight at his gem.

"What do I do?" she asks fervently, her attention snapping back and forth between his two fractured selves, human and Gem. "How do we fix this?"

Steven can't catch a breath through his sobs to even respond at first. He's heaving so hard his chest aches. Tears streak lines through the dirt that's caked on his face from their fight. As he desperately reaches out towards his double, a keening cry slips through his lips. The absence of his gemstone weighs on him as if something had reached its hand inside him and scooped it out like pumpkin guts. One moment he's whole, and the next... He doesn't understand how any of this came to happen. All he knows— the unceasing mantra buzzing within his woozy cotton-filled mind— is that he needs him, has to _reach_ him to become whole again—

_Need— I need to..._

"T-take me back," he croaks, quivering helplessly in her arms. "I- I need—"

Awareness surges into his double's otherwise blank features as he chimes in to order the other Gem. The emotionless monotone of that voice is enough to send a shudder through his bones.

"The temple. _Now."_

* * *

_**AN:** Hello there! I honestly don't know how long this will go on for, or in what direction. All I know is that I wanted to explore the idea that Gem/human Steven coming apart (as per Change Your Mind) is a sort of subconscious survival instinct, one which will only occur when Steven's about to suffer some pretty egregious injuries to his gemstone/body._

_I figure Steven's subconscious attempts at protecting himself were able to:_

_A) Entirely spare his organic body from harm. (All pain human Steven feels here is flat out shock from suddenly being without his gemstone- and while they're separate I imagine he still is somewhat connected, thus can sense something's off when Gem Steven is glitching.)_

_B) Defend against the breaking point JUST enough that it only grazed/cracked his gemstone instead of full out shattering it._

_As clarification, since I saw this question pop up in comments on AO3, Gem Steven didn't actually reform here. They pretty much just... "unfused."_

_As for Bismuth, we don't really get a chance to see her heel turn because Steven is blacked out for it. But the moment the split happened... and she saw human Steven spilled on the forge's floor, and Gem Steven cracked... it's alarming enough that it snaps her out of her rage and makes her realize that despite her confusions she genuinely could never shatter another Crystal Gem over this. The fact that she actually struck a blow this time is guilt inducing enough._


	2. Knowing

_Chapter Two: Knowing_

* * *

Thankfully, they're not alone when they warp into the temple. Pearl and Garnet are sitting at the counter, caught mid conversation, and Amethyst is flopped lazily across the couch with her arm hanging over the edge. Still shivering, Steven clings ever tighter to Bismuth's arm, glancing with tear stained eyes between his Gem self and Garnet, the only one in his direct line of sight.

She shoots to her feet. Her mouth twists into an expression laced with more raw panic than he's ever seen her convey in his life, and that thought alone hurts enough to shoot a physical pang through his nerves.

"Steven! Bismuth!"

"Ah, there you are," Pearl greets amicably, and begins to turn to face the warp pad. "We were wondering where yo- _oh good heavens!" _

"Dude..." Amethyst says as she shoots upright on the couch, her face turning a paler shade of purple.

He feels Bismuth's form grow tense at their now inescapable attention, her fingers wrapping around his prone body just a little bit tighter. The pink clone generated by his gemstone glitches, the edges of his hard-light form morphing to fuzzy static that phases in and out of shape. Simultaneously, Steven winces at the uncomfortable sensation of pins and needles tingling through his limbs.

Any and all shell-shocked confusion dies at the unquestionable sight of a cracked Gem. His family rushes across the room to the warp pad in no more than a nanosecond flat, their shrill, panicked voices and Bismuth's overlapping each other until he can barely pick out what any one of them is saying. His ears begin to ring. More arms than his disoriented senses can count dance under his back, and before long a thick blanket is wrapped around him, (is that his entire bedspread?), and he finds himself secure in Garnet's hold, halfway across the room by the loft stairs. Safe! Admitting it leaves his stomach gnawing with nausea, because it feels so much like a blatant betrayal against the forgiving, accepting person he aspires to be, but it's a relief to no longer be in the mercy of Bismuth's grasp.

The Gems continue to fuss and argue about goodness knows what, their faces blurring in and out of focus as the seconds tick on. Notably, Pearl's voice rises above all the others. She kneels next to Other Steven, wrapping her arm protectively around him. (He may be imagining it, but he swears he can feel the phantom whispers of her touch on his own shoulder.) He's mostly gotten used to that baseline dull ache left behind in place of his gemstone by now, but whenever his counterpart's form flickers and warps due to the crack that's no doubt splayed across the rose quartz's surface, that ache spikes into sensations uncomfortable enough to make his toes curl. If this is the pain he's able to feel without his gem altogether, then what kind of agony is Other Steven in? His eyes brim with hot, sloppy tears, a sharp whimper passing his lips. The others are far too busy arguing to notice.

"—took him to the lower forge alone? What were you thinking? It's far too hot for him down there!"

Bismuth pales. "I'm- I honestly didn't think about—"

"'Kay, but literally none of this explains this freaky clone action," Amethyst butts in, jutting her finger towards the pink Steven standing motionless in Pearl's embrace. "Somehow he split _entirely apart _from his gem, so—"

"Enough!" Garnet says. One of her hands gently strokes his forehead, a stark difference from the impatience etched within the tension in her face. "This entire conversation is irrelevant, we should be—"

"Y'guys," he croaks, but they're all so caught up in argument that he's brushed right over, which... kinda hurts. A lot.

"—how can he fuse with his gem half again if he's completely hu—"

Pearl bristles. "It is not irrelevant, something terrible's happened and Bismuth hasn't explained herself!"

"Pearl, I'm _trying, _but you won't—"

"I don't care how any of it happened!" Garnet roars. Even though it's not directed at him, he flinches at the harshness of her anger. "His gem is _cracked!"_

The room falls silent.

He nuzzles his head into the crook of her arm, feeling ever safer in her embrace. "Thank you," he whispers. She responds with a gentle squeeze.

To his side, Bismuth squirms a little, nervously folding her hands together and apart over and over...

"This is all my fault," she says brokenly. He's almost positive there's tears budding at the corners of her eyes.

"This isn't about us," Garnet says, more sensitively this time. "This is about helping _Steven." _Then, in a whisper only for him: "Hold on. You're gonna be all right, I promise."

Steven gets the sense this comment is more for her benefit than his. He's unsure if that should scare him or not.

(How many futures has she just watched where he di- _No,_ he thinks. _Not going there, nope nope nope.)_

Amethyst hobbles up onto the warp pad then, urgently gesturing for everyone else to join her. "Well come on, no time to waste, yeah? We gotta get the two Stevens to Rose's fountain!"

The other Gems agree readily, and follow behind. Bismuth's steps are stiff and stilted. Meanwhile, Pearl leads his quiet pink counterpart by the hand, assisting him up the stairs of the warp amid his glitching. Out of everyone, the blank shock written clear as day across her face suggests she's especially haunted by the existence of that hard-light version of himself. More so than everyone else. Carefully regarding her as Garnet carries him— still wrapped like a burrito— in his blanket, Steven can't help but wonder why.

The warp activates, enveloping them in its glow. In seconds, they're all coursing through the warp stream at record speed. One thing he knows for sure: he's super glad he has his bedspread with him, because this strange little pocket of space hung between dimensions has a knack for being chilly, especially outside of the stream. It'd suck to start shivering again right after finally settling down.

Reassuringly, the promise of sunrise greets him in vibrant stripes of pink and orange as they promptly arrive at their location. It's night back in Beach City, but he's pretty sure Mom's fountain is somewhere in Europe. Maybe France? So, the sunrise makes sense. Large trees and shrubs block out the horizon in every direction, growing wild without constant nurturing. Still, it all looks leagues nicer (and infinitely less threatening) than the first time he came here. A spike of tingling runs up his nerves, reminding him that unfortunately, with his gem cracked, (and still no clue how he split apart from it in the first place), now's no time to waste sightseeing. His chest tightens as he suddenly realizes he's missing one crucial family member. One family member he— even if it's a bit of a childish thought— really wants holding his hand right about now.

"Wait, I need Dad," he speaks up, voice hoarse and shaky.

Garnet hugs him closer to her chest at that admission. She presses her forehead against his, whispering some reassurance he can't quite catch.

"Amethyst, go back and fetch Greg," Pearl says. "You can meet us at the fountain."

She nods, for once not even arguing with her orders. "On it."

Her long white hair ripples in waves behind her as she sprints back to the warp pad. Soon enough, he spots a column of cyan light shooting up into the sky. His fingers knead the edge of the blanket he's wrapped in, desperately trying to keep his mind from entertaining all the worst possible outcomes. It's becoming harder to ignore his pink double's suffering, even though he's remained near-silent this whole time. Anyways, he really, really hopes she'll be back with his dad soon.

Steven's attention returns to the others, and he watches as Pearl's eyes narrow slightly, her glance sliding back to Bismuth. "When all this is over, we'll be discussing things like upholding sleep curfews, practical safety tactics, and the key differences between Gem and human anatomy."

Her brow tightly creasing, she smooths out the front of her apron. "Yup. Received and understood."

"We'd also appreciate more context on how all _this_ happened in the first place," Garnet says, gesturing between him and the Other Steven hand-in-hand with the tall, salmon haired Gem.

Without any other forewarning, Other Steven's previously glassy expression snaps into alertness. "Breaking point," he blurts out for the first time since the forge, tone flat. "Bismuth cracked me—" a particularly violent glitch overwhelms the stability of his hard-light body, his words fragmenting— "htiw a gnikaerb tniop."

The strength of Garnet's hold on him triples, as if in her fury she's unintentionally forgotten about how she's carrying him in the first place. He winces, totally not thinking about how he's watched her poof corruptions by squeezing them. Nope, no siree, not at all.

"Uh, Garnet?"

"She did _what?!"_ Pearl says, whirling towards the individual in question.

"Okay, okay!" Bismuth backs a few steps away, terror curling across her face at the sight of her looming anger. "So I know it sounds bad, and well, it kinda is, but I swear if you give me the chance to I'll expla—"

"NO!"

The stone pathway splinters under the hard-light Steven's feet as he yells, tipping everyone off balance. Pearl and Bismuth stumble and fall. Garnet takes a knee, and somehow avoids dropping him. Around them, a handful of frail limbs on a nearby tree crack and collapse to the ground. Bewildered and genuinely frightened by this display, Steven desperately locks eyes with the other him, watching his form endlessly warp and morph and flicker into impossible shapes. For a fragment of a second he swears his double's irises flare hot pink.

"You TRUH mih!" Other Steven shouts at Bismuth, his fury pinning her in her spot, even in garbled phrases. "Uoy deirt ot RETTAHS—"

He disappears with a poof of smoke, retreating into the cracked rose quartz gem. _His_ gem. Immediately all phantom pains recede, settling back into that dull emptiness sitting in the pit of his stomach. For but a heartbeat, the gemstone remains airborne, its facets glittering in the glow of the morning sun. It's _big,_ larger than even seems possible, the exposed pentagonal surface only counting for a fraction of its full size. Somehow hidden within him this whole time, the sides of the pink gem flare outward and jut into a steep point. Pearl audibly gasps, slamming both hands over her mouth. Garnet and Bismuth recoil at the sight.

Then gravity asserts control, and it tumbles down, down, careening towards the hard stone like dead weight. Before it can shatter entirely on the ground, Pearl dives with the finesse of a polished gymnast, catching the gem and clutching it tight to her chest as if to obscure it from the others.

"Pearl?" Steven croaks.

Her face is white as milk, and her slight frame is shuddering. "You were never supposed to..."

"B-but this doesn't make sense! That wasn't- you're not a rose quartz," Bismuth stutters, carefully standing to her feet. His stomach sinks at the accusation, his brow furrowing with confusion. "That gemstone, it's—"

In all the years to come, he doubts he'll ever forget the visceral fear laced within Garnet's whisper:

"—_it's Pink Diamond."_

* * *

_**AN:** Cracked/glitching Gem Steven's dialogue, for ease of reading:_

_"Breaking point. Bismuth cracked me with a breaking point."_

_"NO! You HURT him! You tried to SHATTER—"_

_Basically, he was in such poor shape that he retreated back into his gem (in an futile attempt) to heal. He was exerting far too much energy there in his anger, poor thing._

_Note, none of the CGs actually suspected Bismuth intentionally hurt Steven until that bombshell. Before that, their assumption was that she took him on a lil' midnight sightseeing trip and he got cracked/split by accident. I figure they'd have no reason to suspect any foul play before that._

_And Gem Steven... he finally spoke up when he had information of relevance to add to the conversation. Garnet outright requested more context on how the two Stevens split, gesturing towards him as she did, and so he told her. The argument in the temple was more of an argument about him, and not including him, so he remained quiet. And then later, he's calling Bismuth the heck out on her attempt at squirreling away from the blame. He's... very, very protective of his other half._


	3. Restless

_Chapter Three: Restless_

* * *

Perhaps it's mostly due to the fact that his son is mixed species and frequently galavants on magical and oft dangerous adventures with the three alien guardians who have over time become just as much of a family to the boy as he is, but whether he blames it on the fourteen plus years of anxiety progressively gnawing away at him or his chronically poor sleep habits, it's as clear as the ache in his spine that Greg Universe is far from being the poster child of a good night's rest.

He's spent the last hour or so drifting in and out of awareness. Sometimes what rouses him is the subtle ticks of a rickety car driving past on the road outside, a sound his wandering mind has long associated with the dollar signs of potential business. (Not that he's actually dependent on the car wash to support himself and Steven anymore, but hey, old habits die hard.) In other cases it's simply... the ocean. He's never been much of a fan of white noise, and even though he's lived by the shore for a solid two decades now, the rushing ebb and flow has a nasty knack of keeping him awake. Maybe he should just bite the bullet and splurge for earplugs again. Overwhelmingly though, the main reason sleep tends to be such a stranger to him is because his brain simply refuses to shut up. Snippets of awkward social interactions from the day, worries about the faint stress hidden within his son's smiles, song lyric rejects, the grocery list he forgot to write before retiring to the cozy, well-worn mattress set up on the van's floor— just when he thinks he's reached the end of things to obsess over and can finally slip into the blissful embrace of REM, something else claws out of the very mud of the Earth to bully him awake once more. It's a vicious cycle.

Greg rolls on his side, and kicks the edge of his downy comforter until it fully covers his cold toes. The nightly temperature is beginning to drop, steadily paving the way for the height of the fall season. It's not too bad so far, but soon enough the coastal winds will pick up. Delmarva nights get cold this time of year. Steven is warm enough in his bed, isn't he? He's got plenty of extra blankets if he needs them? And does he still need to pay the heating bill for this month or did he already—

He chuckles to himself, realizing all the proof he needs of that lays in his meticulously kept checkbook ledger safely tucked away in the glovebox. As always, he's fussing over nothing. Oh, the woes of parenthood. But his fatherly worries aside, there's no denying Steven's genuinely happy living with the Gems. Despite the occasional adrenaline pumping encounter, with Pearl, Garnet, and Amethyst's constant protection there's really no safer place he could be.

A faint smile lifts his cheeks as his turbulent mind settles and he begins to doze off again.

Just as he's about to cross that final canyon into unconsciousness, something raps against the door from outside. He promptly rolls over and groans into his pillow.

"I swear if this is another one of those gulls," he mutters, out loud but more to himself than anything.

"Greg! Yo G-man, get your butt out here!"

He purses his lips. Nope. No such luck. Looks like it's gonna be Gem business tonight. He shifts to sit up, rolling his shoulders back with an audible pop and brushing his long hair out of his face before finally shuffling across the van's floor to crack open the back door.

He peers blankly at the short purple Gem standing ready to knock rapid-fire outside, his body filled with such exhaustion that his eye bags probably have luggage of their own.

"Amethyst," he begins slowly. "It's long past midnight, and right now the only thing I give a single damn about is how cozy my mattress is, so unless the world's literally ending again I'm—"

"Steven's hurt," she says rapidly, and it's only then he's awake enough to notice the panic jittering through her stout frame.

His heart stutters.

"Wait, _what?"_

At first he swears he's going senile prematurely. Surely none of this is happening, surely this is no more but a worryingly realistic nightmare, but no. _No._ Everything is too real. The way the cold salt air tousles through his beard, the faint scent of fish wafting from the docks... In the end it's the glossiness of her eyes that convinces him. He'd never make dream Amethyst cry, because she rarely does.

Her explanation spills forth in a breathless rush.

"Steven, his gem got cracked, and none of us get how but he's like, somehow split apart, and- and everyone's at Rose's fountain and you gotta come with me right now!"

She's tugging at his arm by the end, and he has no time to slip on sandals or even lock the door before she yanks him out of the van and under the mask of night. He's already breathing heavy by the time they near the boardwalk.

"Hurry!" she urges, the moonlight shimmering off the quartz gem embedded in her chest.

"But what even happened?" he asks, voice high with hysteria, huffing to keep up with her pace. "How did he—"

"I already said, I don't know! None of us do."

"What do you _mean_ you don't—"

"Hey, it's not our fault! She wouldn't tell us everything," Amethyst snaps.

"She?"

They race past Fish Stew Pizza. Greg's stomach gurgles on automatic, (did he really forget to eat dinner again?), but he pays it no attention. Not now, not when his son is hurt, not when he _needs_ him, not when he—

"This new Gem who popped up out of nowhere today! Bismuth. She's apparently like one of Garnet and Pearl's old Crystal Gem buddies, and I thought she was pretty okay for a bit, but then Steven just up and disappears, and when he comes back he's with _her_ and he's split apart, and one of them is cracked, a—"

"Wait, wait, wait- hold on, you keeping saying that, that he's split apart?"

She nods in confirmation. Greg can practically feel the age weighing on his body as his bare feet leave the boardwalk and scurry through the sand. His pace doubles, the mere thought of his son injured and _(dying?)_ in pain thrumming in his mind like a rocker's drumbeat.

"W-what does that even- is there blood, is he still _breathing?"_ he cries, yanking at his hair.

Realization dawns on her face in a wide mouthed 'o' when met with his near-meltdown. "Oh. OH, no I didn't mean like, 'cut in half' split apart, I mean that he's literally fallen apart! There's squishy organic Steven, and then there's this creepy pink Steven that's entirely projected by his gem!"

"_His gem fell out of his body!?"_

"Dude," she says, motioning sharply towards the cliffside, "we ain't got no time to discuss the nitty gritty of this, we gotta hurry!"

With that, she pushes steadily ahead of him, leaving him in the dust- er, sand.

"No time to- _Amethyst,"_ he shouts after her, "for all I'm aware my son could be _dying_ 'cause of that, I need to know!"

Amethyst doesn't listen, though. Her gemstone glows bright purple, and then she disappears completely into a sphere of white light that rips across the shore at the speed of a stock-car racer. Or faster, maybe— he genuinely doesn't know. He swears he could hear a mini sonic boom.

"Wait! WAIT!" he yells, throwing his hand in the air as he pushes himself even faster. A sharp pull in his calves causes him to slow to a stop. He doubles over, heaving for breath as he rests his hands on his knees. "I'm not a young man anymore!"

A distant, disembodied voice shoots his way from somewhere on the other side of the cliff. "Just run faster, you're only like, 40 or somethin'."

"I can't!" he says, his voice practically cracking. "That's the problem!"

* * *

_**AN:** A bit of a short breather chapter, here- for both you and me._

_I imagine Amethyst was holding back her panic last chapter, because she didn't want to further upset Steven. It's only now- apart from him- that she allows herself to finally break down a little._

_Greg is so, so fun to write. I think it should worry me that I relate so much to this poor anxiety man._


	4. Pandemonium

_Chapter Four: Pandemonium_

* * *

"—_it's Pink Diamond."_

Garnet's words hang over them, as commanding in their presence as the hands of the temple when he's out playing on the beach under their shadow. Shifting in her arms, Steven squints, the reveal holding far less meaning for him than he imagines it does for everyone else. Did the Gems _mention_ a Pink Diamond before? Sure, he knows a little bit about the so-called Great Diamond Authority, mainly how they tend to colonize and destroy all life on whatever fertile planets they come across— and thanks to Peridot he's actually seen Yellow Diamond— but Pink? It doesn't ring any bells. To be fair, they're still not super transparent about much of their involvement in Earth's history, but if it's supposed to be important—

"And how is that even possible?" Bismuth outbursts. Like an overfilled balloon, the tension pops. "We knew Rose, we- we all fought with her against Pink, she—"

As the others continue to tussle over this revelation, Steven realizes with a jolt that Pink Diamond's existence has been staring him in the face this whole time. "Holy moley," he breathes to himself, eyes wide as saucers. Of course! The symbols on the ancient sky arena bear a fourth diamond, where more recent Gem structures do not. What color is it? Pink. Back in August, just past his birthday, they popped up to the moon base on Lion's back. On the bottom floor of the base, the Diamonds are depicted in monolithic murals that are like, fifty feet fall. And how many does he remember seeing? Four. Blue, Peridot's Yellow, White, and...

The last mural is Pink.

And somehow, according to Garnet Pink Diamond is... Rose? Is his mom? And so then as the recipient of her gem... so is he...? In a way? Geeze, this is so confusing.

"Garnet?!" Pearl calls, and he realizes then that the fusion's body is quivering. Her arms still wrap protectively around him, but their hold is progressively weakening. Her mouth contorts into a painful grimace.

"Garnet, what's wro—" he reaches out, intending to affectionately pat his guardian's hair, but then her form begins to glow white. All at once, she loses control.

He's unable to hold back his yelp when her grip on him gives up, unable to heft his weight in this state. Bedspread and all, Steven tumbles to the hard stone. The blankets unravel around him like a ball of yarn. Pearl is at his side in a flash, one hand on his back and the other protectively cupped around his gem. With her help he pulls himself to his knees, limbs shaking with the effort, and turns to set his gaze on Garnet. His throat grows dry at the sight of the agony she's in.

She's bent over, arms desperately clinging to herself as if this is the only way she can avoid splitting into two. She clenches her teeth, practically seething as she rides the waves of instability.

"Not the time, not the time, not the time," she chants to herself. Her body morphs, almost pulling apart into smaller halves.

_Almost._

Moments pass, only noticeable via the frantic beating of Steven's heart, and miraculously Garnet is still together. Her breathing stills as she stabilizes. The two gems on her hands stop glowing. Slowly but surely, a wide eyed Bismuth approaches and supports her by the shoulder.

"You okay?" she asks, genuine concern tinting her voice.

"I—" Garnet pauses, her mouth falling slack. "For now. But don't think this changes anything," she adds quickly, shrugging away and piercing her with the same sort of intense look that he's on the receiving end of whenever he's in trouble.

She holds her palms outstretched in defense. "Just tryin' to help where I can, no need to cut your facets down a size."

"Believe me, you've already done enough."

Pearl taps her foot impatiently, still clutching the inert gemstone. "The fountain is just around the corner," she says. "Steven, can you walk?"

His brow creases in concentration. That's a good question, can he? Carefully, he moves one bare foot under him, and tries putting a little weight on it. It's a little wobbly, his system still acclimating to being entirely without the gem side of his physiology, (a problem which they'll hopefully fix soon), but not entirely unstable. He shrugs.

"Uh... maybe if I'm leaning on someone?"

"Excellent!" she says, with a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes. "Here, take my arm, and I'll lead you the last few steps."

"And you," Garnet growls, striding across to Pearl.

She flinches, her pupils shrinking to pinpricks in the shadow of the fusion's anger. Steven's gut twists at the sight. Suddenly he's unable to shake the memories of the last time the two of them fought.

"Wha- me?"

"You knew, didn't you?"

Her ivory cheeks flush bright blue. "I—"

All further words are cut off as she slaps her palm to her mouth. She trembles violently, her horrified gaze snapping to that hand as if it's something invasive and doesn't belong there.

Bismuth also advances upon her. "You did seem rather calm about all this earlier," she points out, crossing her arms.

This comment is enough to drive Pearl to channel all her nervous energy elsewhere. She takes a bold step in front of him, no longer hindered by that mysterious invisible force. "And for someone who tried to shatter the most important person on this planet to me, you don't seem panicked enough," she spits.

"Save your words!" Garnet says, jabbing her finger at her. "Admit it. You knew, you _knew_ Rose was Pink Diamond, this whole time!"

"Y' guys!" Steven croaks from his position on the rough stone, watching in dismay as the two of them devolve into conflict. Kneeling there behind them, he can't help but feel a cold dread climb deep into his skin and seep through his veins— an immobilizing sense of emotional helplessness that rivals that which the loss of his gem gave —or is that merely the morning chill seeping through the legs of his jeans? It's hard to tell.

"You lied to us. To your friends! To me, to Amethyst… to Steven…"

Rapidly, Pearl shakes her head. "It was never my intention to—"

"But you know what the worst part is? I trusted you so implicitly that I never saw this betrayal coming, not ever!"

"Garnet, please," she begs, "you have to understand, there are some things that are impossible for me to explain!"

"Try anyway," she snarls, and summons a gauntlet over her ruby gem.

"I'm trying to tell you, I literally can't!"

"_But why not?!"_

All that helplessness builds and builds within him as he watches this shameless display, until suddenly something in his mind shifts like the tumblers inside a lock and those feelings turn inside out. Frustration is the only fire burning within him now— frustration that no one's listening to each other, that everyone is yelling, that every minute they spend arguing over the unchanging past is another minute his gem is damaged and entirely removed from his body, frustration about the disastrous circumstances that threw him into this whole ugly mess in the first place...

Steven slams his eyes shut.

"STOOOP!" he hollers.

He frantically hobbles across to Garnet on his knees, the patterns of the stone's grain distinguishable through the fabric of his jeans. As he throws his arms around her leg, she lowers her gauntlet... ever so slowly. Pearl breaths a visible sigh of relief. Even Bismuth, standing close behind, turns her gaze in interest to what he has to say. In a perfect world he'd have the strength to literally stand his ground while securing their full attention, but for now he'll have to improvise. He hugs her leg tighter.

"Come on, stop fighting," he begs, blinking up at both of them through wide, red rimmed eyes. "You two love each other! And if you love me..."

He pulls away, and gestures towards the gem in Pearl's grasp. His fingers open wide, ready to take hold of it himself. Ready to feel halfway whole again.

"Let me have it, please."

She's about to do just that when the bridge of Bismuth's nose crinkles with alarm. "B-but wait," the rainbow haired Gem butts in, pushing her broad figure between them, "if we fix the crack, when Pink reforms, how do we know she won't—"

"It's not her anymore," Steven says insistently, fighting to keep the full intensity of his frustration with her out of the micro expressions of his face. "It's me! You all saw him." Taking a deep breath, he sits back on his heels and takes this moment to make eye contact with each one of them in turn. "Listen, I know there's a lot you're upset about, and a lot we still don't understand. I mean, I barely know who this Pink Diamond is! But all the arguing's gotta stop. If we're going to figure this out, it has to be together. It _has_ to. Okay?"

Pearl gives a tight nod, her mouth pressing into a thin line. She silences any further argument from Bismuth in a single acerbic glare, the stockier Gem backing away as if standing on hot coals, and suddenly he understands why people used to call her the 'terrifying renegade pearl.' Her expression softens when she turns to him. She extends the gemstone to him like an offering, gently guiding it into his hands. They held it together for a moment, and as his quivering thumbs stroke its glassy surface he swears he can sense faint vibrations from within. Damaged, but inside, still so very much brimming with life.

"It's not about us," she says, and releases the gem to his care. She peers up at Garnet, inclining her brow pointedly. "It's about him."

At hearing her earlier words thrown back at her, the fusion sighs wearily. She drops her gauntlet laden arm, and lets the weapon phase back into her gem. Like steam dissipating with exposure to chilled air, it's clear all the fight's been drained out of her. "You're right, Steven. Of course you are. We're wrong to jump to conclusions with so little information to work with."

"Yeah, exactly!" he chimes, lifting his pink gemstone to eye level and admiring the way the light refracts through its facets— though this refraction is of course thrown off by the jagged gouge marring its flat pentagonal center. "For all we know, maybe you got a bit carried away and this gem's just a regular ol' rose quartz after all!"

"No, that's definitely a diamond."

The bluntness of this statement wipes the faint smile off his face.

"...oh."

"But you made a good point," Garnet says, and at noticing his stress ruffles his hair. "No matter what we feel, it's not her. It's your gem now. So, we're gonna mend it."

Pearl loops her arm through his, helping him up. For the first time since all this madness began Steven plants his bare feet on solid ground. His knees wobble under his body weight, and he inhales sharply, an intrusive image of him collapsing, dropping his gem, and watching it shatter into a zillion tiny shards zipping through his mind like lightning. But his guardian holds tight, keeping him from toppling over.

"That's it, small steps," she whispers, guiding him. "We'll walk slowly, okay?"

Garnet promptly falls in line behind them, and he can only assume Bismuth tries to follow as well because Garnet barks for her to stay back. He swivels to match eyes with the one who cracked him— a flurry of complicated emotions swirling within him all the while that he's definitely not ready to unpack— and watches her face crumple as they leave her behind. The foliage thins. Soon enough they reach the vast, glittering basin, filled to the brim with his mom's healing tears. Adorning the central platform of the grand fountain, that familiar ringlet laden statue looms over them. Steven thought it almost ethereal the first time he came to this place, but seeing it now just serves to leave him with a knot in his stomach, right in the hole his mother's gem left. Knowing the bitter truths they do now, the peaceful smile painstakingly etched across her stone visage feels like a mockery.

Pearl leads him to the fountain's edge and helps him sit on its rim. Both her and Garnet join him on either side. Basking in the morning sun's warmth, it's easy to forget that it's like one am back in Beach City, and that he's not supposed to be awake right now. His eyelids droop. Hopefully soon this nightmare will all be over so he can collapse in his bed, cuddle with one of his stuffed animals, and have the deepest, most dreamless sleep of his life. His glance drops to the diamond in his hands.

"Well," he says, a noticeable shake in his voice. "Here goes nothing."

Slowly and oh-so-carefully, he plunges his gem under the water's surface. The other two watch, enraptured, as its surface glows with a shimmering brilliance. Simultaneously the deep crack splayed across its pentagonal facet begins to recede. He counts three seconds… then five… by eight, the gouge is gone entirely. Eyes sparkling, he lifts the gem into the air. Now he can barely tell it was damaged in the first place! Maybe he's reading into things too much and it's nothing more but the manifestation of sweet, sweet relief, but Steven wonders if fixing his gem is to thank for lifting the cloud over his mind. He already feels ten times more alert and able than before. (Although he still doubts his ability to walk. Should he be concerned how physically weak he is on his own, completely human?) Nevertheless, he clutches the repaired diamond to his chest, grinning at his guardians.

"Maybe we should come here more often, 'coz I think this is the shiniest my gem's ever been," he jokes with a weak laugh.

"Oh, thank goodness!" Pearl sighs, and throws herself around him.

Garnet joins her in the embrace, and with a sniffle, Steven buries his face in the crook of her arm. His eyes flutter shut as he allows his worries to momentarily melt away. The faint vibrations of their hard light bodies thrum steadily in time with his heartbeat. Gems may not have a physical heart like humans or other kinds of organic life, but Pearl taught him their gemstones constantly refresh their forms through the channels of light running from their core outward, and that in practice it's pretty similar to the blood pumping through his circulatory system. In any case, it's a comforting reminder that he's safe.

"Now can we talk about this peacefully, without yelling?" he says softly.

"Of course," Garnet says with one of her customary half-smiles, and after giving him one last squeeze pulls away. "Bismuth!" she calls. "Your damage has been fixed. You can come out from the tree you're sulking behind now."

Still clutching him tight, Pearl stiffens. "Wha-! After what she did to Steven, you're just going to let her—?"

She tips down her visor, regarding her directly. "Believe me," she mutters, voice brimming with a rock solid assurance that could only come from future vision, "she won't be trying that again."

Pearl helps him sit with his back against the fountain's lip as the other Crystal Gem rejoins the group. Bismuth's fingers fidget almost hyperactively, clasping and folding over and over in front of her blacksmith's apron. Steven watches her glance drift to the gem he now holds in his lap, and while she's calmer than before now that it's mended, there's an undeniable fear lurking underneath as well. His shoulders hunch. Is that what his mother's shadowy past evokes in everyone? Fear?

He's beginning to wish he never popped that bubble in Lion's mane in the first place.

"Pearl, can you tell us _anything_ about Pink Diamond and Rose?" he asks, opening the conversation.

She bites at her lip, glancing between the three of them. Garnet regards her with an especially careful focus.

"No..."

He frowns. "But you want to, right?"

"More than anything," she whispers, her blue irises glittering.

Apparently her words enclose some sort of hidden meaning, because the tenseness in Garnet's expression begins to fade away, a wave of understanding crashing onto shore to replace it. "Gag order."

His nose crinkles. "What's that? It doesn't sound very nice."

"That's because it isn't. The diamonds have the capability of giving irrefutable orders to Gems who are bound to them," the fusion explains, crossing her arms. "Such as, individuals in their court who were given as gifts, or... personal pearls. Pink Diamond must have commanded her not to speak of her true identity."

"So hold on. Lemme see if I can get this straight. You think," Bismuth begins, and points directly at Pearl, "that before the rebellion _she_ was Pink Diamond's personal pearl? Our lone Pearl?"

The Gem in question shifts uncomfortably at their discussion, clamping her lips together. Silently, Steven hugs her from the side, pressing his cheek against her upper arm. Her form quivers.

"Yes, I do."

"And then somehow all along, Rose Quartz, respected leader of that rebellion, was actually the diamond were were supposedly fighting against all along? Was fake? Just some created persona? But why would some spoiled, imperialistic upper crust do that in the first place? None of this makes any sense!"

"If I could actually explain anything, it'd make more sense than you'd expect," Pearl says.

"Maybe she just _wanted_ to be Rose Quartz," Steven shrugs. "Is that so bad?"

Garnet adjusts her opaque glasses. "Depends on what her motives were. See, I thought I knew Rose. Knew what she stood for. Now I have no way of being sure." She pauses, gazing vacantly between him and Bismuth. "None of us do."

The group lapses into uncomfortable silence at this, their sense of morale deflating further and further as the moment stretches on. That sick, twisted feeling in his gut returns with a vengeance. Talking is still leagues better than fighting, but… now his family is suspicious and tense, battered and broken. He doesn't want this. Desperately, he looks to Garnet.

"But… Pearl can find a way to get around that gag order eventually, can't she? Then she can tell us everything herself!"

"I've tried," the lithe Gem blurts out, hugging her knees to her chest. "Ever since you were born I've tried everything I could think of to get around it, but it's been a part of me for so long that I don't know if I _can."_

"Tampering with a Diamond's commands is too risky," Garnet says. Delicately, she rests her hand on Pearl's shoulder. "I've lost too many friends to this war. As much as I want to know the truth, I won't risk another."

Tears bud at the corner of Pearl's eyes, which she quickly dabs away with the butt of her palm. In the lush garden around the fountain, a flurry of birds begin their morning songs, their lilting chirps meshing together into more complex melodies until they coalesce into a grand symphony. It's achingly beautiful, and since song birds like this don't nest near his home Steven is mesmerized. There's a bizarre dissonance, however, between the content mood their singing encourages and the dour shadow he can't seem to escape from under. A golf ball sized lump catching in his throat, his attention returns to the pink diamond in his lap. The diamond that should be sitting flush in his belly right now, its weight as ordinary and familiar as the clothes on his back. He splays his hand over his stomach. Even if he's beginning to recover from the initial shock by now, the absence of his gem still haunts him to his core, still feels like someone's reached into his chest cavity and yanked out one of his essential organs. It's always been a part of him, ever since he was born, but now, because of what Bismuth did, because he wasn't careful enough...

His eyes burn, growing damp.

"So... does this mean I'm just. Human, now? Forever? Is that it?"

"Oh, Steven," Pearl breathes, and pulls him tight into her embrace. The dams break, and hot, sloppy tears roll down his cheeks.

"No matter what, you'll always be a Crystal Gem to us," Garnet says softly, tracing abstract shapes on his back as he cries.

"But I won't have my shield!" he blubbers, voice thick. "Without my gem I won't have _any_ of my powers! And- a-and if I'm completely human now, and humans can't fuse with Gems, then how—"

"We wait and see. You'll be alright, I promise."

"I hear footsteps approaching," Bismuth says. Bounding in front of them with the force of a door slamming shut, she morphs her fist into a mallet.

Sure enough, true to her claim he hears movement nearby— and as it grows closer, wonderfully familiar voices too. His heart soars. When did they miss the sound of the warp pad activating?

Pearl bristles. "Put that away, it's just Amethyst and Greg."

"_Greg?_ What kinda Gem's a Greg?" she asks, brow creasing.

"He's not a Gem, he's my dad!"

Fresh tears spring forth as he catches a glimpse of the pair approaching from the distance at a generous clip. They emerge into the clearing, forms no longer obscured by the trees' shadows. Amethyst's features are wide and frantic, and his dad hauls the bedspread they left behind midway to the fountain. He's breathing heavy as he plods along, nearly wheezing. They match eyes simultaneously.

"Dad!" he cries, hoarse.

"Steven! I'm coming!"

His dad hastens his pace, scurrying across the remainder of the clearing on his last burst of adrenaline quicker than even Amethyst. He almost trips on a dangling edge of the comforter but catches himself a heartbeat before disaster. Shaking his head he tosses the whole mass of blankets to the ground and keeps running. Steven thrusts his gem into Pearl's care and daringly, on his own strength, pushes himself to his feet. His knees almost buckle, but through either a miracle or sheer stubbornness he somehow manages to carve his way across the rough hewn stone to the one person he needs right now more than anyone in the world. With all the rest of the Crystal Gems in witness, he bounds towards the promise of his dad's cozy embrace. He gasps in alarm when his legs finally give out at the last step. Unable to stop himself, he starts to crumple…

"Whoa-ho there!" Dad exclaims, catching him just as he's about to crash knee-first into the rocky ground. "We don't need you hurting yourself again…"

"I'm okay now!" Steven says, swaying unevenly in his hold. "I'm- I don't know how much Amethyst told you, but I'm okay."

The rigidity in his dad's body increases tenfold as he pulls him even tighter, pressing his tear stained cheek against the hem of his sweaty old tank top.

"She said that- that you'd split apart or something, and your gem was cracked, and—"

"Dad, you're squishing me," he says, voice muffled against his chest.

"Oh, whoops!" he chuckles, and eases up on him. "Guess I'm just really glad to see you moving and alert. Sorry we took so long, Schtu-ball. Your ol' man ain't as agile as he used to be."

Steven flashes him what he hopes is a reassuring smile, and wipes his face dry. A hand lays itself on his shoulder then, and he turns his head to find Amethyst peering at him in interest.

"Yo, where'd your creepy twin go?"

Pearl crosses her arms. "Amethyst!"

"Did you guys, like, deal with his crack yet?" she asks, completely ignoring the other Gem's chastising. He has to admit, ignoring the jab she made at the other Steven, the level of concern etched upon her face is genuinely touching.

"Uh, he kinda poofed?" he says, gesturing towards the rest of the Gems. "But the gem's fixed! Pearl has it."

Pearl lifts the diamond so they can all see. Its facets catch the sun's glow, scattering the light in all directions. His dad's face grows pale at the sight.

"Man, and here I thought you were exaggerating," he mutters to Amethyst.

She shrugs widely. "Maybe about everything else, but not when it's actually serious."

"What I don't understand is _how_ it happened. That gem's huge! And it's not like it's gonna fall right out. How on Earth did you lose it anyway?"

Garnet and Pearl shoot a poisonous glance in Bismuth's direction. If it were subtle that'd be one thing, but it's blatant enough that all other conversation runs silent. His skin nearly crawls in the awkward silence. He can feel sweat bead on his brow as he watches his dad's expression grow taut.

"Whoa," Amethyst says, holding up her hands. "I'm, uh, feeling some real uncomfortable vibes here. What'd I miss?"

Steven gives a nervous laugh, and runs his hand through the curls at the nape of his neck.

"Well... that's kinda a long story."

* * *

_**AN:** A few meta notes on all the pandemonium that took place this chapter:_

_Pearl's gag order still stands even after the reveal because that mental lock has not been undone yet. I headcanon that it would take an individual actually crossing through her memories ala in canon to unlock that door. But since "Hey Steven, climb through my head and find my phone" is such a bizarrely specific idea, it won't be something Pearl will consider as a potential solution for a long while._

_In the end, I chose to interpret the order this way because it allows Steven to still have a mystery to unfold. As a writer that's far more fun than an info-dump._

_Garnet, as unstable as she currently is, was letting her anger get the best of her in her fear of the fact that she never saw this possibility coming, and took that out on Pearl. If she stopped to think she would've realized the reason why Pearl couldn't provide any information much earlier._

_At this point, Bismuth is super lucky that her rash attempt at shattering Steven isn't the headline right now. Everyone's still so focused on the Pink Diamond revelation that nobody's quite gotten around to dealing with that issue yet. Her time is coming, though. It's just not currently a priority._


	5. Onward

_Chapter Five: Onward_

* * *

"So… hold on," Greg says slowly, raising his hand to cut off the others' incessant yammering. "Just lemme- let me take a moment to see if I can properly wrap my head around everything. So you're saying that—"

He turns on the one they identified as Bismuth, pointing at her with such ferocity that his finger might as well be a— what did they call it again? Oh, yes!— a 'breaking point' itself.

"—that she tried to _kill_ my son by smashing his gem?"

"Mmmhmm," Garnet nods.

As usual her eyes are entirely hidden behind her opaque visor, something that always made getting to know the Gem particularly daunting in those early days, but by now he's close enough to infer her full disposition from her body language and tone alone. And as far as he can tell from the clipped words and stiff movements, she's pissed. The full brunt of her anger is thankfully restrained… he imagines for Steven's sake. He hugs his son closer, the boy currently nestled against his midsection and sitting on the fountain's rim. Garnet sits on his other side, with Amethyst next to Steven. Pearl, meanwhile, kneels on the ground holding a surprisingly deep-cut gemstone in her lap, the very gemstone that by all rights should be embedded in his son's navel but currently isn't. He frowns and tugs at his hair (a bad habit of his, over the decades), finding his thoughts growing more and more fragmented over this by the second.

"But she only tried to kill him because she thought he was Rose… who bubbled her thousands of years ago because she wanted her to shatter Pink Diamond. But then Rose actually was Pink Diamond… all along? And somehow fake shattered _herself?"_

"Yup, that's pretty much it," Steven says with a faint laugh, no amount of falsified cheer able to conceal the conflict brewing within him. Greg watches him clutch at the bottom hem of his shirt, and his heart nearly shatters right there on its own. His boy's grown worryingly savvy as of late, plastering on a brave face whenever he thinks the others can't handle the full burden of a child's stress. He probably assumes he's getting away with it, too. His mistake. One of the many things fathers grow attuned to over the years is the habits and facial tics of their children. All that said, if this is troubling for him, he can't begin to imagine how traumatic and confusing this upheaval is for Steven.

_God, and he's only fourteen! He shouldn't have to deal with any of Rose's war fallout._

"And then," Greg continues, gesturing between his son and the pink gem Pearl holds, "before she could actually kill him he split in two?"

"It was almost like he abruptly unfused," Bismuth supplies, maintaining a healthy distance from the rest of the group.

"But it didn't feel like fusion at all," Steven says, and shudders. "It hurt, it hurt really bad."

"He was unconscious for at least a minute. The half with the gem, the pink one, started screaming and tried to fight me away from him but I knew I had to get him off the forge's surface so he didn't burn." The rainbow haired Gem hangs her head in shame. "I was so worried he wouldn't wake up 'coz of me."

"Yeah, sure ya' were," Amethyst spits, and crosses her arms.

Pearl's eyes narrow with a precise intensity. "Amethyst, please. Not now."

Contrary to whatever assumptions on her he held before, Bismuth shows no inclination to argue in any vain hope of saving face. Instead she stands stiff before the group, appearing just as haunted by the consequences of her actions as Steven is. While the back-and-forth between her and the Crystal Gems continues, her fingers twitch, desperately yearning for something to tinker with. As someone who frequently seeks out the reliable comfort of strumming improvised chords on his guitar in times of stress, he can relate. Of course, far be it for him to excuse this new Gem's actions when they almost cost him his only son, but at least she has the decency to express remorse over it. He's furious at her, he truly is, and yet… He also can't help but feel a twinge of pity lighten his heart upon hearing her side of the story. Huh, funny. Normally he's more apt to harbor a stone cold grudge over this sort of stuff. He blames his kid's influence.

"I was angry at Rose, not Steven," Bismuth says as he tunes back in to the conversation. "I was so sure that this was all just another one of her lies that I— well, you all know. But when I saw what I'd done…. When they split apart and he fell to the ground, I—!"

Her voice cracks, and he watches her nearly crumble like chalk.

"I- I made a terrible mistake, and I'm genuinely sorry," she finishes.

"'Kay, so you're super sorry and promise never to hurt him again, we get it," Amethyst says, blunt sarcasm oozing from her words. "But seriously, is no one gonna address the ginormous cluster hangin' over our heads? Y'guys! New headline! We just found out Rose was a total sham!"

Steven holds up a finger as he interjects. "Actually, we don't know anything except that she was apparently Pink Diamond, but…"

"Yeah, and Pink D's like, the bad guy, Steven! She's the reason they had to fight this whole stupid war in the first place! And then, what? She creates _you_ just so she doesn't have to deal with the fact she's a liar?"

The young teen shrinks away from her anger, a lump forming in his throat. Greg's jaw clenches. His hand tightens around his son's midsection.

"None of this is Steven's fault," Garnet says quietly, firmly placing her sapphire laden hand on the purple Gem's shoulder to quiet her down. She shrugs away at her touch, lips jutting into a pout.

"Or any of yours'," Pearl says.

Greg's eyes lock on the slender Gem at her abrupt comment, and he watches with apt attention as her thumb glides across the largest facet of the diamond in her lap. Hearing her voice comes as a surprise, as she's been unusually absent from this conversation thus far. It seems none of the others want to talk about it in depth right now, but apparently she's forbidden from mentioning anything about Pink Diamond. It's yet another betrayal, yet another reason why the sight of the rose blossoms growing wild around them and the delicately carved curly-haired statue at the fountain's center leaves him with uncertainty gnawing at the pit of his stomach.

And yet… _and yet._

What if he's being a hypocrite about all of this? It's not like he told Rose everything about his past, either. Rose was a diamond, sure, but— he's a DeMayo. There's a number of dark days attached to that name he'd rather let die in the past too. Are they really entitled to the full narrative of the life she left behind? Is anyone?

He scratches at his scalp. "Listen, Amethyst. I understand all of you are upset, and rightfully so. I can't exactly say I'm thrilled to hear all of this either. But the bottom line is… I know the woman I loved. Maybe not for long, but I grew to know her in ways far more intimate than even some of you. And if there's one thing I can say for absolute certainty, it's that… despite her mistakes, despite everything else she probably lied about, her love and respect for all of you was not a sham."

Pearl nods. "I almost can't believe I'm agreeing with Greg of all people, but he's right."

"And you're entitled to believe that," Garnet says evenly. "But no matter what we believe, I still think it's wise to try not to make assumptions about her in the first place. Either good, or bad. At this point, what we know is what we know, and I can't see any easy way of changing that in the near future."

"So, what are we supposed to do about all this now?" Amethyst asks, all her earlier anger dissipated in her exhaustion.

She considers this for a second, visor glinting in the glow of sunrise.

"Nothing."

"_What?"_

The fusion doesn't budge an inch. "We don't change our tactics."

"But- but if she was our leader, and we always just blindly followed what she wanted, then—"

"No matter her original intentions, the Crystal Gems, as a movement, is far bigger than one diamond," she says. "We move onward. We thrive. Never mind Rose."

Steven squirms in his embrace, and in a small, timid voice— a jarring reminder of the child he still is despite his recent leap in emotional maturity— asks the question he's sure has been weighing on him ever since he got split apart in the first place.

"What about me, and my—" he tries and fails to stifle a yawn— "my gem? What am _I_ supposed to do now?"

"We'll deal with your Gem half when he reforms, and he will," Garnet says gently. "But right now, you need your rest. We all do. Pearl, Amethyst, help him to the temple and get him tucked into bed. Bismuth, Greg. I need to speak to both of you."

Everyone nods at the Crystal Gem leader's directions, and they all act accordingly. His eyes drooping just as much as his son's despite the pink tinted skies and chirping meadowlarks, Greg helps him stand to his feet. Steven's knees still quiver but thankfully this time he doesn't crumple. Pearl loops one of her arms through his, still holding his gem in her opposing hand, and together they begin to plod towards the warp pad they arrived earlier. Amethyst follows them but notably lags behind, guilt written across her face clear as day. She delivers one final glance at Bismuth, razor sharp and flaring with hurt, and then disappears in the orchard's shadow.

A palpable silence brews between the two remaining Gems then, uncomfortable enough that he's almost left with sweat beading on his brow just watching them. Eventually doing so becomes too stressful, and he moves to retrieve the downy comforter that's long since been forgotten on the stone midway to the fountain. He folds the bedding as compact as he can, and drapes it over his non dominant arm, distantly acknowledging that it'll have to go in the wash. He wishes he could've gone home with Steven too. What does she need a human like him for right now, anyways? He's no fighter, or mediator. The cool grey one blows a nervous puff of air from between her lips and wraps her hands around a few strands of her rainbow dreads. Garnet's expression twists into a frown. Stepping towards her, she crosses her arms.

"Bismuth…"

"If you're going to bubble me away again, just say it," she blurts out, hanging her head in resignation.

Ever so subtly, Garnet tilts her head as if caught off guard by the visceral hurt pooling in the other Gem's words. In any case, her tone remains steady.

"We're not bubbling you."

"What? You're—?"

"It was avoidable miscommunication that led to that the first time. I won't let that happen again, especially not to a friend. However," she says, holding up a finger before the other Gem can interject, "as consequence for striking a fellow Crystal Gem in cold blood, until further notice you are no longer welcome in the temple. You will not seek us out. You will in no circumstance find yourself alone with Steven. If we require your help and you are willing, we'll call for it. But for now, until we're ready to begin to forgive, you're on your own."

Bismuth's gaze turns up towards her once more, sober in silent acceptance. She blinks rapidly to stave away the tears, and her lips press together tight. Greg's unsure if the emotion she's desperately barring away is remorse about her exile or shell shocked relief that she won't be bubbled away for another five millennia.

"I encourage you to explore this planet as you reflect upon your actions," Garnet continues. "I think you'll find a lot has changed since the rebellion… and I think that with time, so can we all."

"Am I relieved now?" she asks, voice thick and wavering.

She regards her with a long, searching look as she deliberates. "Yes. You may go."

At first Bismuth spins on her heels, making to leave, but apparently something else stirs on her soul because she pauses. Taking a deep breath, she whirls back around to face the fusion.

"I know this probably doesn't count for much after all that happened, but. I truly am sorry, for everything." She turns to regard him directly, her gaze piercing but sincere. "Tell Steven that I hope he can forgive me one day." And, to the other Gem: "And tell Pearl I'm sorry for what she had to go through, with Pink."

"I will."

"Take care of them, would you? Yourself, too."

Garnet nods. Perhaps as a final sign of goodwill between old war comrades, she offers her hand. The way she does leaves the sapphire on her palm fully exposed. Greg bets it's a powerful and evocative gesture to a Gem who is being punished for almost shattering another. It's a salve, an acknowledgement that _you can become better, and I trust that you already are._

Bismuth links her broad fingers between hers, and exhales shakily. "Goodbye, old friend. I hope I'll see you again one day. And hey, if any of you ever… _bismuth_ me," she jokes with a weak laugh, "you know where I'll be."

She gives her hand a gentle squeeze, and then breaks away. Her eyes can't quite meet theirs.

"Go in peace," Garnet says.

Greg and her watch in quiet respect as the rainbow haired Gem turns on a dime and departs from them, leaving both the fountain and the ranks of the Crystal Gems behind as she fades beyond the shadow of the grove. They wait. Not too long after, a bar of pure cyan light shoots to the sky, accompanied by that resonant bell like tone he's long associated with the warp pads. At the sound some of the tension in his companion's form finally eases. She reaches to wipe under her visor. Geeze, tonight's really been a high emotion day for her as well, huh? First she's reunited with an old friend she hasn't seen face to face in millennia, and then later that evening she's met with the terrifying threat of Steven's mortality…wherein she learns that this same old friend is the reason he's cleaved apart and cracked to begin with. And then there's all of Rose's lies, which— as much as he loved her— he's sure he'll also have to wrestle with in the coming season.

She sighs, and turns to him.

"And as for you..."

He scratches at his scalp. "Heh heh, am I in trouble too?"

She chuckles briefly, lips turning up in a soft smile. "No, of course not. The truth is, I need your help. I can't always… be here, to look after Steven."

His brow creases. Such oddly specific words from such an articulate person. 'Be here?' What does she mean, that she's leaving the other Gems? That she's going on some extended mission? And why now, of all times?

"What do you mean?"

"My future vision is clouded, incomplete, but I can sense we're approaching a crossroads." She lays both gems on his shoulders, and suddenly her visor flashes away, her three eyes intensely pouring into his, searching, _beseeching._ It's the single most vulnerable expression he's ever seen her convey.

"Greg. He trusts you with matters he doesn't always trust us with. I know you've mostly kept your distance from Gem activities up to this point, but the time is coming when you won't be able to separate these worlds anymore. I need you to keep a close watch on him. For me. Promise me you'll do that."

"O- of course," he says, mind nervously whirring with an infinitude of uncertain futures based on this new information, and oh golly, does this even lay a finger to what she experiences every moment of every day? "But if you don't mind me asking, what's coming? What crossroads?"

"I don't know," she admits, her gaze falling wayward. "I can barely see the shape of our future anymore, only faint impressions. And… and that terrifies me. So much has changed so quickly."

She's nearly quivering, eyes blown wide, and Greg only now realizes the degree to which he took her unyielding strength for granted all this time. He rocks back and forth on the balls of his bare feet, reaching for an answer on what to do, what to say to support a person who until now, has never been in need of that support.

"Are… you handling things okay?"

Garnet clamps her lips together, taking a moment to ground herself once more. Then with a intentional flick of her fingers, her visor shimmers back into place.

"No," she says evenly. "No, I'm afraid I'm not."

He exhales with a prolonged, meandering sigh when the two of them finally reach the temple, solid crystal phasing into existence under his feet in a bright flash of cyan. Despite how long he's known the Gems, a trip through the warp stream is a rarity for him. In the beginning that was mostly Pearl's doing— with her staunch refusal of allowing humans anywhere near Gem structures vocal enough to convince Rose to leave him behind. Thankfully Pearl began to tolerate him enough in the later years of the relationship that she lifted the ban. After that he and Rose would occasionally steal away on dates in exotic locations only accessible by warp pad, and while he has many fond memories of his time with her in these breathtaking places he must admit he's never been a big fan of this form of travel in the first place. He's not keen on flying for similar reasons— it's simply too disorientating. What can he say, he's a wheels to the ground sort of guy.

He carefully steps down from the raised platform. In the loft, bundled under fresh bedding, Steven stirs awake and lifts his head upon hearing their arrival. Dark bags emphasize his puffy, reddened eyes. Greg's heart seizes at the realization that he's been crying all on his own, when no one can see him, in the dark.

"Dad, Garnet!" he whispers, forcing a weak grin. "You're back!"

He tosses the dirty comforter on the floor next to the warp pad, and bounds across the room to him as fast as his weary joints possibly can.

"Hey, buddy," he says, climbing up the stairs to the loft. He plops himself down at the foot of the mattress. "You all cozy now?"

His son snuggles even deeper under the sheets, clutching one of his stuffed bears to his chest. "Yup, all tucked in."

"Good, good. I, uh- I'm really glad you're okay."

And at these words, exhaustion weighs Steven down like a twenty pound barbell, shattering his brave facade. He visibly deflates, his eyelids drooping.

"Yeah," he sighs, blankly staring off into the distance.

Upon following the path of his glance, however, Greg realizes that he's actually not staring at nothing. He's watching Garnet first and foremost, who's leaning against the fridge, but more importantly… Sitting smack dab in the middle of the kitchen counter is his inert gemstone, nestled within the cottony folds of a bath towel. Of course. He needn't a second guess of what has him so glum. He leans in to embrace him and Steven immediately reciprocates, flinging his arms around his neck so tight that given the option of comforting his kid or constant, steady airflow he'd choose to forgo the breathing every time.

"Can you sleep here tonight?" he asks, voice brimming with a vulnerability he hasn't heard from him for a few years.

"Of course. I'll never say no to a good couch, heh heh."

"No, I mean— with me, up here. Please. I really, really don't wanna be alone right now."

His son pulls away, and peers at him with the most doleful, starry eyes one could muster. He can't help but chuckle.

"You do know you ain't gotta pull out the puppy dog eyes on me, right?"

"Yeah, but was it _working?"_

"All right," Garnet interrupts, leisurely making her way up the steps to the loft. "Let's get you back to bed."

He nods in full agreement. It's super late, and the kid desperately needs some rest after all the trauma of this evening. Working together, parent and guardian, they help tuck him back, snug and secure. Heeding to Steven's request, he crawls under the covers as well, leaning against the far wall. Distantly, he notes that he left his van unlocked when Amethyst whisked him away to the fountain, but by this point he's too comfortable here on this mattress to dream of making the trek across town to fix that. He'll just have to trust it'll be fine. Beach City is a small, secluded place, after all. Most residents barely lock their doors at night.

"Garnet, am I even able to fuse with my gem again?" Steven asks meekly, before she can turn to leave them to rest.

She pauses, balling her fist against her mouth as she considers.

"I can't see everything, but I do know you'll be alright," she promises, and reaches down to brush through his dark curls. Delicately, she presses a kiss to his forehead. Steven's eyes light up instantly. This time, he grins for real.

"Wow, homemade waffles? And we're all sharing them as a family! Well, except Pearl, of course. But she's still there with us."

"That's right. It's together breakfast."

The tension wound through Greg's spine eases at hope's return to the atmosphere of this household. With a relieved smile, he rubs his hands together. "Guess I'm breaking out the ol' waffle iron tomorrow, then!"

Steven throws his arms around the taller Gem. "Thank you," he says, clinging tight. "I really needed that. Can you… maybe stay out here with us too?"

The puppy dog eyes return in force. Any weaker individual (himself included) would surely be powerless to resist this maelstrom of pure Universe charm, but Garnet's no brittle Gem. From what little she confided to him back at the fountain, he bets she's in want of some alone time right now. True to his predictions, she smiles apologetically.

"I wish I could, but I have some delicate matters that need to be attended to in the temple."

"Awwwww, man!"

"But I'll see you at breakfast," she adds before his burgeoning pout can fully reach his eyes.

This promise seems to placate the boy enough for him to relax into his pillow. His eyes droop as he watches Garnet amble down the stairs. He's not the only one— Greg's own eyes are beginning to ache from sheer exhaustion as well. A sudden spike of jealousy overtakes him, upon remembering how the rest of the Gems don't get tired, and don't require sleep. If only, if only. Oh boy, tomorrow's going to be rough, isn't it? It's what… at least one in the morning by now? Squinting, he cranes his neck to catch a glimpse of Steven's alarm clock.

It's twelve forty-six. Close enough. With any luck he'll drift off to sleep within the next fifteen or so minutes.

"I love you," Garnet says from downstairs, directed at Steven. She shapes her fingers into a heart. His lips curve into a smile as he watches this. While he's never doubted the depth of her affection for him, she isn't often this transparent about it. Perhaps she thought his son could use the reminder in the wake of a terrifying near-death experience.

"Love you too," Steven chimes. "Goodnight!"

With that, the Gem retreats across the room to the temple door. She holds her palms up to the star insignia. The matching gems light up, glowing a vibrant blue and red, and the magical doorway slides open— almost as if dissolving from the middle— to reveal the private chamber held within. She steps forward and disappears into the bowels of the temple, leaving the two Universe boys bundled under the covers in an uneasy silence. Steven sighs under his breath. Greg can tell without looking at him that something is gnawing away at his son's heart, bubbling up within him like soda fizz.

"Dad?" he eventually asks, flopping onto his side to face him. "Where's Bismuth? Did she leave from the fountain?"

Yup, there it is. He feared this was coming.

"She's—" he pauses, trying to determine how best to phrase this— "Garnet had a discussion with her. She's not welcome here in the temple until further notice. As punishment."

Understanding dawns on his face. "Ohhh, so she basically reverse grounded her."

"Exiled, yes."

"Huh." Steven hugs his plush bear in the crook of his arm even tighter, and stares up at the ceiling beams with a concerningly numb expression. "Well... I _guess_ that's fair."

Greg frowns.

"What's eatin' you up there, bud?"

"It's just…" He tussles at the top hem of the sheets, his knuckles turning white. "Even though she tried to shatter me, and that was terrifying and all... I could tell she felt really guilty about it right after. And besides that, she was actually super kind. I hope she'll be alright on her own."

"_You're_ the one who's super kind," he says with a soft smile, and reaches out to ruffle his son's hair. Steven playfully bats his hands away, cheeks flushing at the compliment. "Not everyone your age would ever stop to think about the people who harmed them in that way. Heck, not many adults would, either. I'm not sure I could."

"But I've also been thinking... Peridot and Lapis tried to kill us when we first met them, too. And now we're all friends, and it's fine, right?"

Greg considers this, stroking at his beard. As much as Steven defends their oft-erratic behavior, he's not sure he personally considers those the ex-Homeworld Gems who are bunking in his family's old barn _friends _yet. The first time he met Lapis, she attempted to steal the ocean and broke his leg. And as for Peridot, she once pushed him off a roof with next to no warning. (God, he would've broken his leg again if it weren't for Garnet's future vision, huh?) But despite his current opinions on them, it's true that they both have a amicable rapport going with Steven (and for the most part, the rest of the Gems) these days. They've made an effort to learn, to grow with the lush Earth around them. Against the very unmovable nature of their kind, they've succeeded in the impossible. They've changed.

"So what if we're being a little too hard on her?" Steven continues, eyes glistening. "What if it pushes her away forever?"

"Mmm. I understand where you're coming from, but she didn't just _try_ to kill you. She almost succeeded. Sometimes there's such a thing as being too compassionate, you know?" He chuckles, and props himself up on his elbow. "Heh. You really are like your mother, in that way. Y'see, once she told me about the first time she came across a pigeon, and apparently she—"

"Can we please not talk about her right now?" he interrupts, his voice strained.

"S-sure thing," Greg stutters, mentally smacking himself for not considering the stress the topic of Rose has become for his son before he foolishly ran his mouth. "Sorry, I didn't think."

Closing his eyes, Steven snuggles closer to him, scooting under the covers into his arms. "It's okay," he whispers, and yawns. "We're okay."

* * *

_**AN:** A few meta notes on this chapter:_

_-Amethyst reacts with more vocalized anger to the Pink Diamond bomb here because she has not yet crossed an integral moment of identity building character development- re: Beta/Earthlings. In canon, she tells Steven after A Single Pale Rose that none of the PD/rebellion stuff should even be their problem, and she's absolutely right, but here I imagine she's still at the point where she's internally making it her problem when it doesn't need to be. So she lashes out. Wrongfully._

_-Meanwhile, Steven's Gem self hasn't reformed yet because he was only just healed from being cracked. I figure that takes a lot outta a Gem. He'll need a bit more time before he's ready._


End file.
